Wow, what a time to be alive!
I often find myself sitting in bed at night, deep in thought, still trying to understand what is happening in the world and how shocking I still find it that we're living through this nightmare.
The mix of emotions i'm feeling towards this pandemic and lockdown are from one extreme to the next, frustration, fear, anxiousness to name a few of the negative. I miss my family, I miss my friends, I miss being able to go to the shop without needing to wear protective equipment and lining up for half an hour, I miss being able to go for a coffee, I miss being free.
But on the flip side, I find myself some days, enjoying this period and really appreciating what it has given me, what it is teaching me and what it has allowed me to do. I read a quote on instagram last night which said, when there is rain, look for the rainbow, when there is darkness look for the stars. And how true is that?
There will always be rainstorms and darkness in our lives, whether it's personal problems, work difficulty, or a worldwide virus - but you know what else there always is? There's always a light at the end of the tunnel, there's always some positivity that can be found in any situation, no matter how small or far away it may seem.
So i've decided that i'm no longer going to dwell in the what if's, no longer going to fixate on the negatives - and every time I do feel a little deflated i'm going to read a list of positive point I made for this time. So, I want to say - thank you lockdown, you have given me time with my family that I would never of had without you.
You have given me the opportunity to learn new recipes and cook the things i've not had the time to, you've given us all something to look foward to when this is all over and you've made us realise how much we cant live without our friends and family, you've made me less busy which has helped me to focus on things that are so important but sometimes take a back seat like praying and reading the bible, you've given me the opportunity to stay on top of all my housework which makes me feel great (and even had time to clean out the cupboard i've been meaning to clean for the last 6 months!), but most importantly, you've taught me what matters. You've taught me that your health is more important than anything and should take a priority in your life, you've stripped me of all my luxuries and reminded me what is, and what is not a necessity , and you've also made me realise that anything can happen at any time, life shouldn't be taken for granted but unfortunately sometimes it is, and if this pandemic has taught me anything its that.
I hope you all look past the clouds and all your skies are blue and bright very soon.
All the best,
Kat